Little Reunion

How do you differentiate crush and love?

In the very beginning you want to question your feeling.

Starting to question the weird comfort you have when you are around him.
The way your heart beats.
Why you try to look your best around him.
How your radar is very sensitive around him.

You question your sanity.

You question your body.

You wonder, is it just a crush? a temporary attraction?

Or is it something deeper than that?

I met him again.
after two years never seen him in person :)
He was still exactly the same.
The same humble guy,
the smart and focus person I used to adore.

Yes, adore :))
such a cheesy and creepy word.

It was a nice reunion, awkward, but a huge wake up slap for me.

He again, made me to pursue my education harder.
He always gave me the feeling to compete,
to try my hardest,
to show him and my family my best....

I screwed up...
for the past two years
but that meeting with him made me slightly ashamed of myself for letting those two years ruined me

I lost those happy dorry feeling around him
But he still gave me those feeling to compete and try my best :)
He was my first serious crush,
the first person I online stalked that much ;)

Who said small reunion with your crush will be crap?
I was grateful for it actually.
I realised my mistakes, but he made me feel the urge to fight harder.
He didn't say it directly,
but he was my example..
he is....

xoxo
Fat Girl